Thursday, August 29, 2013 | 6:00 PM

I posted on love languages sometime ago, you can find it here on my wordpress. Almost a year on, and I think nothing much has changed. One quote about love languages that struck me ever since I saw it at some workshop essentially said this (cannot remember the exact phrasing): don't treat people the way you would want them to treat you. Treat them the way they would want to be treated! And it was also about getting to know other people's love languages, and expressing your love to them in the way they would like it expressed. Pretty much what Ji Inn was saying in her entry on Appreciation.

I just took the love languages quiz a few minutes ago and this is my score:


Some questions were hard to answer because I didn't like both answers but I guess this is about as close as it gets with a standard test.

Quality Time. As I went through the questions, I could already guessed this would come out tops. Perhaps is something that I have come to value more and more as my time gets more scarce in a busy schedule, and as I realise that I do enjoy the company of people a lot. In the end it's the connection between people that I really like - feeling understood when the other person expresses the same sentiments, exchanging views and engaging one another on a topic, or sharing experiences in a space that has become comfortable. 

Receiving Gifts. Actually I am most happy when people give me gifts that show they 'get' me, and I feel understood.  I think everybody likes to feel that way - receiving a gift that is thoughtful and unique to your character celebrates your individuality. 2 gifts that I remember: the dayspring calendar from a JC friend.


He gave it to me as a birthday present earlier this year. The greatest gifts are the ones that surprise you (in a good way), and this was one of them in the sense that I wouldn't have thought to buy it for myself, but I realised that it captures the essence of my character so well.

The other one is from Ji Inn. I still remember when she first gave it to me, she was very mysterious about it and was saying she wasn't sure if I could carry it home. That made me curious about what she could possibly have gotten me haha. It's this painting she bought, the reindeer with a bird perched on its antler. People always ask me if I painted it when they see it in my room. I've always wanted one of these paintings, but just never wanted to spend on it for myself. I love the colour and painting :)


Words of Affirmation Words are naturally important to me since I like reading and writing so much. It's the best way I can find to express myself. Words of affirmation are not as important to me as just well, words. I prefer long letters to gifts because I like to hear people's thoughts, especially those of friends, because it helps me get to know them better and it tells me what they're thinking. I think it's one of those times where you assume that people do the same thing you do, and I assume that people are the most honest in their letters since I am most honest in mine.

Physical Touch The only thing I can think of in relation to this is my hug-a-friend day thing which I haven't done in a while. With close friends, I tend to hug them when we meet up/part at the end of our meet-up..I don't know, tight hugs with these friends make me feel loved and thankful for them, and express how I feel about them.

Acts of Service Most of the time when people do me favours, I feel indebted to them. So actually this isn't the best way to show concern for me. I have very high expectations of myself in wanting to thank every single person who has helped me, repay the debt in some way etc etc. Even though I know that it shouldn't be that way (because love isn't transactional), I still get the nagging feeling if someone is too nice to me and does a lot more for me than I do in return.  Yup and I find that as you grow older and your friends network expands, it's harder to keep this up. But it doesn't take away the guilt.

That said, I appreciate all the help my friends give, and I wish people (including myself) would show more compassion towards the people around them in terms of just helping someone they see in need carry bags, open the door, or run an errand.

Sometimes I think it's quite amazing that people can get together despite their different love languages (since they probably wouldn't be aware of each other's unless they take the test...), and how the whole chemistry has to click between 2 people for them to fall and stay in love. That's the cool thing about love - getting through the misunderstandings and differences.

A random but related quote (and cute picture!):



Have a lovely week! :)



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Wednesday, August 28, 2013 | 10:58 PM

Hello there, 

Recently I went to do the Love Languages questionnaire again (it's here if you're interested), and was a bit nonplussed about the results. Plus I was wondering if I was choosing options that I wished I could be more like, instead of who I really am. So I went and did it again just now:


Now I think this reflects me better, even though the highest score hasn't changed. But it should be pretty accurate, though I wouldn't go so far as to say it's true. After all, I've never been in a relationship, so what I have is based on my family and friends and what I envision I would like if I were in a relationship. Let me talk a bit about each love language.

Let's start with my highest score, Quality Time. I like to spend time with people I love (like duh). One of the biggest reasons why I love going home on weekends is that I get to talk to my mum. I always tell her what's happening in school, interesting anecdotes as well as my troubles, and she'll provide her thoughts and guidance.

I also like spending time with my good friends just chilling and talking, having HTHTs or doing random stuff together. When I have a crush I like to do that too (lol), so if he encourages it then that can be a bit misleading for me even though it's just my heart being silly and jumping to conclusions.

Physical Touch. Hmmm. When I first did this test a few years ago and scored the highest for this section, I got a shock. I was still in the 'conservative and demure' stage (still am! HAHAHA who am I kidding) so I wasn't expecting that. Now, though, I can see more of myself in that light. I like hugs, I like holding hands etc. If a friend touches me I will feel a sense of closeness. Maybe that's why I often reach out to touch my friends too. Guess it's also why I really don't like it when friends who aren't really close touch me. PS: I'm super sensitive about people touching my hair/head. Do not attempt if you are not someone super close to me.

Words of Affirmation. This is the one I didn't want to acknowledge that I cared about, but I think I really do. I'm happy when people compliment me even though I get a bit shy sometimes (and then not. Hahahah). Similarly, criticisms cut deep. I try telling myself not to be this affected but it's not that easy.. My mood can be destroyed just by someone telling me or implying their disapproval of me. Have to work on that.

Receiving Gifts: I think I like gifts, but sometimes I don't know what to do with gifts I don't particularly like or have a use for. But I enjoyed getting random soft toys for my friends when they were down. And I really like making gifts for my close friends. There was once I was very passionate about that so people around me have received things like handmade cards, felt plushies, and even a felt aeroplane:

Not perfect but I think it looks good enough. Plus my trademark red ribbon.

There's even a front wheel! Not retractable though.

Some Christmas cards I made in 2010:
You wouldn't believe how troublesome that glitter was.

One of my personal favourites. I was really into 3D pop-outs.

The red ribbon again. And those are real strips.

I think I had more imagination last time. 

Had lots of fun on those projects but recently no time lost the motivation to work on stuff like that.

Acts of Service: Guess this isn't really important to me but I still appreciate it when people go out of their way to do something for me. Think I'd prefer if you did those things with me instead of for me, y'know? Still, it depends on who it is!

K that's all for this week, bye!

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Tuesday, August 27, 2013 | 10:28 AM

This week's themed entries are kinda RE: Ji Inn's previous post On Appreciation, because I was inspired by a particular line.
If you really want to do something nice for someone, think about what that person places high value on, not what you place high value on.
It really reminded me of Gary Chapman's love languages, and you'll see why in this excerpt taken from wikipedia (because obviously wiki is the best website to cite...)
The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate is a 1995 book by Gary Chapman. It outlines five ways to express and experience love that Chapman calls "love languages": gifts, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service, and physical touch. [...] He also writes that people should not use the love languages that they like the most but rather the love languages that their loved ones can receive.
I think it's extremely important to know your loved one's love languages, so that you can make them feel adored in their own way. I remember saying something really nice to my boyfriend for the first time, and not being able to understand how he could feel soooo loved by a mere compliment.

Until I realised words of affirmation are 
not as important to me as it is to him.

Here's what I'm reading from my scores:
  1. I don't give a shit about receiving gifts. At all, apparently. (I just prefer receiving practical stuff that I want/ need vs ~random cute gift things~)
  2. I'm totally for touching and being touched. ;)
  3. I'm totally for spending time together touching and being touched. ;) ;)
I'm kinda surprised that Acts of Service didn't get ranked higher. (I guess the scores went somewhere else...) Because I do feel exceptionally loved when a person goes out of their way to do something nice for me. Like when a housemate helps me to get rid of the spider in my room, or when friends pass me medicine when I'm not feeling well, or when the boyfriend accompanies me to the doctor. I'm just little ol' nondescript Maddie, why do I deserve all these nice things you people are doing for me?

A Gero mate lending me his knee guard when he found out I had sprained my knee. So 
overwhelmed in that instance that I switched to wearing his knee guard even though I 
have my own. Not forgetting to instagram it and showing how loved I am, of course.  

Yesterday, I was just hanging out with a friend and I realised it was the second time that he was going through his pictures and pointing out random things like his family and pets and hilarious shots. So I just blurted out, "Why are you showing me all these?" He replied, so smoothly, something along the lines of showing me that he treasures this friendship. I just thought that was a really interesting and unique way to display affection, but I'm not exactly sure which category it falls under.

Lastly, as a reminder: If I'm molesting you, I love you okay. I can't help it, I'm so sorry.

Have a good day,

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Sunday, August 25, 2013 | 10:45 AM

I couldn't help myself, the previous post was too much fun to write, and brought back so many memories. So here's the anti-thesis of it!

6 Things We Did When We Had Unlimited SMSes

1. Texting all your friends letting them know of your new number

And that you had UNLIMITED MESSAGES OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG. You are now one of the cool kids who could fire messages away. And you just cannot believe it when your friend can't text you all day like you wanted to. What do you mean, you can't send more than 16 messages per day?!?!?!!! You need to change your plan. Now.

2. Passing on chain messages
If you don't forward this to 7405986017834650784275806728 people, Rag Doll will appear and kill you in your sleep.
These were the worst. I did not appreciate getting suspicious whenever I was trying to fall asleep at night, or being worried that I wouldn't be kissed until I was an old hag. I was so close to dressing up as a rag doll and killing whoever sent me those messages. If you'd sent me these sort of messages before, there is a high chance this is why we never spoke again.

3. Sending silly broken messages

H
A
P
P
Y

B
I
R
T
H
D
A
Y

!!!!!!!

What?! You remember doing this too. Sometimes not by yourself, because you've got 2 other friends crowding around to discuss who's gonna send H, who's gonna follow up with A, and who's the last one to send P. Rinse and repeat for PY BIRTHDAY. We truly thought it was fun back then.

4. Wishing all your contacts Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year

Even if we don't talk for 364 days, that's fine. On that very special day, I will wish everyone in my contact list (and that includes you) Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Because it is only between 25th December and 1st January that I realised I have too many unlimited SMSes that I could use just like that.

5. Saying goodnight about 99 times before you can finally sleep

Goodnight.
Sweet dreams.
I love you.
I love you too.
I love you more.
No I love you more.
Muacks.
Muacks back.
Goodnight.
Sweet dreams.
I love you.
I love you too. But ARE YOU DONE YET? I NEED MY SLEEP.

6. Text your buddies all the time

Because you could. And you'll never bust your bill. This is also the reason why we were constantly texting in class, even if your buddy was sitting just two tables away from you. Sorry not sorry to our teachers, cause better texting than talking in class, right?

Two kids not paying attention is better than causing
other classmates to get distracted while they chat.

Looking back, I think having limited SMSes seemed to be more fun? Oh, the thrill that comes with being a reckless teenager. #livingontheedge #yolo :') We might have been stupid while dealing with limited messages, but it seems like we did sillier and more exasperating stuff when we had unlimited messages to spare, hahahah.

Hope you liked this too,

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Saturday, August 24, 2013 | 1:07 AM

This post is inspired by a certain post on a friend's blog, and I think it appropriate to add a disclaimer here that this is purely my own views on the issue, something I've come to understand for myself over the years.

Appreciation is not a straightforward emotion. It is not a strong, direct feeling like anger, sadness or elation. It is nuanced. It is a mild thing that you express or feel when someone does something nice for you. But more often than not, we are also obliged to express our appreciation in regard to something someone thought it was nice to do for you.

The thing is, you can't truly feel appreciative of something that holds little or no value to you, even if the person who gave it to you feels otherwise. You can pretend to be thankful, but really, all you can be thankful for is the effort the person put in, believing you would like it.

When the value two people place on the same thing is different, the mismatch results in one party feeling bad to the other for not being truly appreciative, while the other becomes upset that the recipient has an obvious lack of regard for what he/she thinks is important.

If you really want to do something nice for someone, think about what that person places high value on, not what you place high value on. Putting that person's values above your own is a surer way to please him/her. And anyway, if you truly want to do something you think is nice for someone, then please refrain from expecting appreciation and just do it for the sake of doing it. I know how under-appreciated we all feel when something we do is disregarded, but I'm starting to learn how to expect things from people based on their values, not my own. Thinking from their perspectives helped to shape some of the choices I've made these past few months. It's not easy and it can be heartbreaking when it goes against the choices you might have made on your own free will, but if you care, if you really want to care for someone, then that person's feelings take priority over yours. Even if that means stopping or being less persistent about 'caring' for that person. (Of course this is a general statement and is not meant to be applied to every situation and aspect.)

It's not that you yourself doesn't matter. It's important to be true to yourself, but that's just exactly it: be true to yourself. Once it concerns another person, you can't just think of yourself. The world is full of complex beings who have their own set of value judgment. Show some toleration and spare some thought for their feelings. You would think people would do that for the ones they care about, but it's astounding just how many of these well-intentioned actions are actually well-intentioned towards themselves. I have to admit I'm guilty of that sometimes. Perhaps most of us are. It's easy to fall into the trap of thinking you're doing something nice for someone (thereby warranting their appreciation) when you're just doing it because it makes you feel good (that you are doing something nice for that person).

I think I probably strayed a little bit. Bottom line is, for recipients of supposed well-intentioned gifts or actions, express your appreciation, even if it's just for the effort. Because you, too, have to take into account the giver's feelings. It's socially expected (and on social expectations, there're lots to talk about but it's for another day). For 'givers', think about how what you want to do would affect the intended recipient. Think about his/her values, not your own. It's like choosing a birthday present. You'd want to get something he/she would like, not what you would like.

I hope this post isn't misunderstood to be targeted. It's meant to be an expression of my own views for everyone else. You may not agree with some of my opinions, but if this strikes a chord within you, please do yourself a favour and reflect upon it to see whether, perhaps, what I say makes sense. If it doesn't, then oh well, nevermind.

All the best,

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Thursday, August 22, 2013 | 9:14 AM

The conversation that inspired this post. 
And oh, Whatsapp, what would I do without you.

Those were the (good?) old days, of not having apps that work on 3G networks to send messages freely. So here's a tribute to the things we used to do when we had limited free text messages to work with.

6 Things We Did When We Had Limited SMSes

1. Dividing 500 over 30 and realising that you could send 16.6666666666666666666667 texts per day

Don't pretend you'd never done that. Because we all know we've only got that many text messages to spare, and we gotta plan wisely who we wanted to waste our messages on. Reply your groupmate about that project? Nah, you'll see each other at school tomorrow. You gotta spend that 16th message saying goodnight to that darling who had been wishing you sweet dreams for the past week. That's right, we got our priorities real straight!

2. Rushing home after school to be online on MSN

Cause chatting on MSN was free. And everyone you needed to talk to will be on MSN after school. Every. Single. Day. Once upon a time, we were replying messages on our computer screens more often than on our phones. And people actually asked for your email address before your number or Facebook. Oh, memories. :')

3. Typin sumtin lyk dis bcox...

It was extremely important to maximise the 150 characters you've got.So the objective is to squeeze everything into a single text message.Also you end up eliminating the spaces after the full-stops.Because that is a waste of characters.150 characters isn't a lot because the ever-important closing line "i luv u muax <3" already costs you one-tenth of the characters. (It really amounts to 15 characters. Are you counting it.)

4. Getting panicky right before the bill come

Because you're pretty sure you'd sent about 167 messages, instead of 16.6666666666666666666667, each day. When the bill is due to arrive in your mailbox anytime, you start to get really nervous because oh gosh how would the parents react?!?!?!?!!!!!!!!! No regrets, though. Did anyone actually regret busting their bill?

5. Deny that we are dating someone

No mum, what are you talking about. Of course I'm not seeing anyone. I just happened to have a lot of projects that I needed to discuss with my group mates. Seriously. You see this incoming message? It's for a really important project that I'm working on.
.
.
.
Oh shit, please don't grab my phone because that's him advising me how to worm my way out of this situation. Shit shit shit. Wow, that look on mum's face. Goodbye guys, it was nice knowing everyone.

6. Being punished for exceeding the limit (or for 'dating at such a young age')

Sorry dad and mum, for getting carried away with sending too many messages that were supposed to be "the last one for the day". But my 15-year-old self still insists that if you'd extended my curfew just a little bit longer, I wouldn't have to resort to flirting over text so much.

Hahahah, who am I trying to kid.

I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I did writing it, and comment below if you found yourself chuckling because you used to do these things as well! Coming up soon, 6 Things We Did When We Had Unlimited SMSes. If you could identify with this, I hope you'll like the next one too!

Teehee,

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Friday, August 16, 2013 | 9:48 PM

It's a new semester and I've been a bit drained and unprepared for everything to start.

I'm quite happy with my timetable though, and most of the modules I'm taking this semester (lit, social work and 2 CAPT modules) look like they'll be interesting. I was falling asleep in most of them this week :/ but hopefully I'll be more awake come Week 2.

Cat Baba was back to her habit of zi-pai-ing:

(haha I actually forgot why she always grabs my phone until she started doing it again. Some photos are too cute not to share)

Still, I'm glad to be back at CAPT (the residential college I stay at at NUS) and this is what's been happening the past week:

1. Late night captain's ball sessions
The same night I returned, I soon found myself playing captain's ball. Walking around on my heels (trying not to put pressure on the blisters from playing barefoot), and washing off dirty feet at 1am, that's when I knew I was really back in the craziness of CAPT. This week alone, we've played twice and we're playing a third time tonight. Love the game and how it bonds people :) we've been having orientation activities every night for the past 4 nights, and on the second last night Dragon Slayer (refer here for explanation of the weird names) asked the freshies to play. I liked it because I got to know the freshies slightly better - it's somehow easier to break the ice this way than talking to them.

2. Dinners with my OG
Throughout fledgling week (CAPT's way of describing our orientation activities. It follows the idea of a college ready to take off at the end of the week), our neighbourhood emphasized "family." Because that is really what our friends and neighbours have become to us over the past 1 year.

Today as I was thinking about my post, I realised that - cliches aside - these people have really become close to family. I realised that I had tried to set time aside to have dinners with my OG in the week, the same way I try to set aside time on weekends for family.

3.  Birthday surprises 
We planned a birthday surprise for Hat and Prawn. It was quite funny because while two friends were bubble wrapping Prawn's door, I happened to run into him in the lift, about to get off on his floor. I panicked and asked him to help me. I ended up asking him to come up to my floor, take a roll of bubble wrap, and put it in the common lounge on level 1.

Thinking it was safe to let him go to his level lounge as long as he didn't go near his room, I told him I didn't need any more help. But for some reason the whole group migrated to someone's suite, so he walked past his room and of course, saw two people sticking stuff on his door. "I didn't see anything! I didn't see anything!" But obviously he did.


Hat still didn't know what was going on, till we finally gathered as a group (5 of us in total, with Kiwi late as usual) and sang happy birthday to them both. Then Prawn very embarrassedly gave Hat his half of the cake (he started eating it because it was left outside his door lol). And then we started the short trail around CAPT. Prawn and Hat were given clues with tasks like "Play a duet together" and "Win a foosball match." With each clue they also picked up a kiwi (for Hat) and tabasco sauce (for Prawn) because one loves fruits and the other loves tabasco sauce with everything.

(playing foosball with a kiwi)

Our last stop? The common lounge where we took a photo with the bubble wrap:




Oh, and we bubble-wrapped the wrong door. Hat swopped rooms with his suitemate but we didn't know! Luckily the guy hadn't moved in, so Hat helped us to bubble wrap his own door.

4. One CAPT 
On the first night of fledgling week, we had "branding" which was basically writing "One CAPT" on our hands with henna. Sunny Side-up helped me to draw a ship's steering wheel :) and I drew flowers for her in return.


For black neighbourhood, we had our own special donkey (it's supposed to be a horse) called Tulee (?) that we took photos with. Turns out it's for our door label:



The door labels were presented to us on the last night of fledgling week ^^. Really a lot of effort went into planning the neighbourhood and college-level activities, and I'm proud of my friends/thankful to the committee for it!

5. Door gifts
Left a note on Gummy Bear's door, and she promptly returned a post-it and snack:


Couldn't help smiling at how familiar it was, and in a very nice way, to have people leaving friendly/encouraging notes at the door.

My Room
I loved my room last semester, but I realise I need the change in environment to help me kind of reset for the new semester. 90% of it is from last semester since I just decided on that today:








Favourite part of the room - moved Chip over because I haven't replaced the pillows on the grass mat.


Will write more soon about the new semester! :)

happy to be back,

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Monday, August 12, 2013 | 11:56 PM

It's the first day of school! I dreaded coming back into hall on Sunday night because it signalled the end of the long holidays and the start of a new semester. Just one day in, though, and I am awash with memories -- and making new ones.

Here are 13 things that made hall life so unforgettable.

1) Climbing 10 storeys' (some claimed) worth of stairs to get to my room -- courtesy of being assigned a room in the tallest block in the hall which sits upon the highest hill. I'm lucky I didn't get the highest floor.

2) Hanging clothes out to dry in the morning, going for lessons, and then groaning out loud when it starts to rain. Some rooms get sheltered clotheslines, but that also means they don't get the crisp freshness of sun-dried clothes. (Sun-dried makes them sound like fruits.)

3) Having classmates and friends live so close I can literally holler to get their attention.

4) Having to defrost (and excavate - I'm serious) the freezer component of my lousy fridge at the end of every semester. It kinda sucks that after some time, you can't put anything inside (or get anything out of) the freezer. Which means no more ice cream.

5) Having ice cream parties in our hall rooms. Or any party, for that matter. We're notorious (amongst ourselves) for hanging out at someone else's room till past midnight, just talking about random things or having what we call heart-to-heart talks (HTHT). In fact, some of my friends have made it a point to visit more rooms. They call it room-hopping. Many life lessons to be learnt, I've heard.

6) Rushing to the printing room 5 minutes before midnight, trying to print notes for the next day's lessons. The frustration is compounded when:

a) The printer runs out of paper
b) The printer spoils (and it's locked so you can't try to fix it yourself)
c) Someone's hogging the printer
d) The printer and computers shut down (after midnight) while you're printing something

Makes you wanna break something, I swear.

7) Hall dance. Is awesome.

8) Knocking on friends' doors and then running away. Multiple times. Yes we still do this.

9) Huge gathering of people to spring surprise birthday celebrations, usually near midnight. They can complain all they want but it's part of hall life and it keeps happening.

10) Talking about life and stuff deep into the night with the roomie.

11) Making silly comments and antics and having laughing fits in the room with the roomie.

12) Both roomie and I studying so quietly I sometimes turn around just to check if she's still there.

13) Being proud to claim which hall I am from when people ask. Despite its many shortcomings (especially now that the shuttle bus routes have changed - we've lost our advantage), this hall has been, and will continue to be, my home away from home.

Good night,

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Sunday, August 11, 2013 | 11:32 AM

Returning to school after 4 weeks of winter break (in Aussie) or 2.5-3 months of holiday (in Singapore) can prove to be immensely difficult. Especially since the drive to study has been long lost after the last exam the previous semester.

So here's a How To Survive Your First Week Back At School guide!

1. Get enough rest the night before

It's tempting to celebrate 'the end of holidays' or 'the start of school', I know. Go ahead and do it, but I'd suggest partying on a Saturday night. So that you can have enough rest on Sunday and regulate your body clock for Monday morning.

2. Pack your bag, plan your wardrobe, etc. the night before

So that you don't have to wake up freaking out over what to wear, whether you should curl your hair, and where your pencil case is. Plan, execute without hesitation, and you'll be ready for school in no time!

3. Set as many alarms as you need.

I use just one, but I know of friends who go up to 8. The alarm will start ringing an hour earlier then they intend to wake up, and they will simply keep slamming on the snooze button every 10 minutes. Only in college have I ever seen people who need running alarm clocks, Lark silent vibrating alarm clock, and having to solve maths sums to turn off their alarm. Do whatever it takes to end your affair with your bed.

4. Have a nice breakfast

I don't have breakfast regularly throughout the semester, but I find that having breakfast makes me less irritable (i.e. less grumpy-looking and more approachable) and more focused. Try this if you haven't before, it makes a huge difference!

5. Arrive ~10 minutes before your first class

So that you'll have enough time to search for your classroom or visit the washroom. It's always better to be there early and make friends with that one other classmate, than be late and make a clumsy entrance into the classroom with everyone staring at you.

6. Pay attention

Because you'd wanna know how to contact your tutor when shit happens, or when all the huge assignments are due, or where that cute exchange student is from. ;)

7. Ask for help

Don't be afraid to approach a stranger to ask where room 248 is (you might find a classmate), or to ask your lecturer 'silly questions' about that unit. You'd rather be informed than be lost.

8. Be friendly

Having friends makes lessons feel like they're much shorter than they really are. It also makes group work so much more enjoyable when you have a few mates you are comfortable working with.

9. Do all your readings and assignments


Because you don't want your tutor to have a bad impression of you. First impressions are important, you don't want your GPA down the drain just because of that one reading you left out the first week of school.

10. Get keen

Having a positive attitude and being truly excited for school can make returning to school a better experience. Find a good studying routine for yourself, and stick to it. You will see results if you're consistently putting in effort into your studies.

Whether you're in primary, secondary, or tertiary education, I hope this guide will be helpful in some way. May everyone have a great week back at school!

My friends and I at our beloved school's biggest open day in a century. 
Don't forget to have regular fun as well to lead a balanced life!

Much love,

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Saturday, August 10, 2013 | 12:56 PM

I recently chanced upon this article, here's an excerpt:
Dolphins have the longest lasting social memory ever recorded for a non-human, according to new research that leaves open the possibility that dolphins possess the world’s most impressive memories.

Dolphins have what are known as “signature whistles” that function like their individual names plus added information, such as sex, size and health status. Humans have something similar. When a person says his or her name aloud, for example, listeners may infer additional information. For example, a large man with a head cold is more likely than certain others to have a loud, deep and nasally voice. Figuring these sorts of things out among humans is not an exact science, though, as a short guy with a booming voice might prove.

At any rate, dolphins each have their own signature whistles, and other dolphins certainly pay attention to them, as Bruck determined.

He played recordings of signature whistles to dolphins that had once lived with the animals that made the calls. He also played recordings of dolphins that the listeners had never met.

Bruck found that “dolphins get bored quickly listening to signature whistles from dolphins they don’t know.” When they heard calls from their long-lost friends, however, the dolphins immediately perked up.

“When they hear a dolphin they know, they often quickly approach the speaker playing the recording,” Bruck explained. “At times they will hover around, whistle at it, try to get it to whistle back.”

In one notable example, a female dolphin named Bailey, now aged 24, heard the signature whistle of another female named Allie, whom she had not seen in more than 20 years. The two females used to share digs at Dolphin Connection in the Florida Keys.

Bailey appeared to be thrilled to hear the recording of her old buddy, and tried to communicate back.

There is little doubt that relationships among these animals are deep and meaningful. The findings also indicate that these are highly intelligent animals capable of very complex mental processing.

Their communications are equally complex, such that Bruck and some other researchers now wonder if dolphins have their own language. The creation and possession of language has never technically been applied to any species other than humans.

“We know they use these signatures like names, but we don’t know if the name stands for something in their minds the way a person’s name does for us,” Bruck said. “We don’t know yet if the name makes a dolphin picture another dolphin in its head.”

For his next round of research, Bruck said, “That’s my goal — show whether the call evokes a representational mental image of that individual.”
You probably didn't read all of it, but if you did, a trophy to you. Long story short, dolphins are found to have incredible social memory, and are suspected to have their own language.

Picture of a dolphin because who doesn't like looking at dolphins?

Since young, I've always been pretty uncomfortable when people referred to the sounds crows made as 'noise'. What, are crows simply nature's accessories meant to sit quietly in the trees as decoration? Yes, the crows' incessant cries may be annoying to our ears, but do they not deserve to interact with their mates as well? (Hmm crows' rights. And ravens are so much noisier than crows, trust me.)

Isn't it incredibly pompous to think that we are the only animals who can communicate using language? And isn't it even more conceited to think that all animals should interact the way we do, as if our way is the only/ cleverest way to communicate?

In fact, while reading children books and watching 101 Dalmations, I've wondered if all animals are capable of speaking to one another without humans knowing. Do you remember how the dogs and horse basically saved all the dalmations, while the people could barely do anything? What if everything in nature could shout secrets, and humans are the only ones left out? What if we are the ignorant ones?

What if, huh?

I'm aware I sound a little crazy (this is kinda thoughnotreally what I meant when I mentioned I have uncommon ideas in my introduction), and I shall end this here. Dismiss this entry if you'd like, but if you're actually pondering, please comment/ hit me up, we could be friends.

Kinda wack,

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Thursday, August 8, 2013 | 8:14 PM

I love family traditions, and one of them was having a BBQ every national day. We've since stopped it, although now and then we'll do it when we're in the mood for it. I remember the funny thing about family BBQs was that every time, usually on a Sunday, we got out the grill and started igniting the charcoal, it would start raining. Thankfully, we could still have it under the sheltered porch. There would be chicken wings, hot dog buns, potato salad (one of the rare occasions my family has salad), mash, and steak that would never cook completely. My favourite part was helping with the mash because of the heavenly smell that fills the kitchen the moment hot potato meets butter. And tasting it to get the taste just right.

Around 5 or 6pm, the television would already be on even though it was mostly the hosts getting the crowd hyped up at the stadium and the television hosts discussing some new feature or other to the annual parade. Half the excitement is in the anticipation, so it was always nice to sit down to this and get hyped up along with the crowds in the stadium. And hyped up for dinner too!

When I was young, I read a lot of books by Enid Blyton (Famous Five and all), and I always assumed I would one day live the kind of life I read about. I never knew that the things in those books - 4 seasons, living in gardens with toadstools and fairies - either didn't exist, or happened only in places like the UK. So when I found out, I set my heart on moving there when I grew up. Singapore always seemed like a rather dull and commonplace country to live in.Over the years though, I've come to love this sunny island and with each overseas trip, I look forward more and more to returning home. Learning about the histories and problems of other countries in school helped I suppose, as did building my own memories and relationships that make Singapore worth coming back to.

Praying for Singapore
I went for my church's prayer meeting for the first time in a long while on Tuesday, and during the meeting we prayed for Singapore. It was quite cool because as we prayed, I thought about a few things:

(1) the wonder of Singapore's birth
As we thanked God for seeing Singapore through the years, it reminded me to think about the wonder of Singapore's birth. After all, that's what National Day is about right? Celebrating Singapore's independence, and the miraculous change from a problem-plagued country to the Singapore it is today (not without its problems definitely, but we've come a long way). Or even further back, how this island first came to life with villagers and lions roaming (according to myths), and then a bustling sea port. Just imagining how Singapore began from nothing.

(2) Diversity 
I can't remember the exact prayer pointer for this, but it made me see our multi-racial and multi-religious culture with new eyes. Seeing with fresh joy what a privilege it is to be part of this culture, and how remarkable it is to have people of so many different races and cultures (including the increasing number of foreigners) live together. Consider how elsewhere, sometimes by no choice or fault of their own, people live with their countrymen waging wars against others from the same country, same religion. Even as problems surface, I think we can take a moment to see what a remarkable nation Singapore is by virtue of its existence and its current culture. 

As national day draws near, I'm kind of glad to be spending the day with my family. Minus the BBQ. I think the atmosphere will still be around.

Happy National Day!

With love,


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Wednesday, August 7, 2013 | 11:35 PM

For as long as I can remember, the singularly most important thing about National Day for my family was the holiday, and by implication, the long weekend, which was excuse enough for us to head to Malaysia for a short trip. Considering that I have many relatives residing in M'sia, it really isn't much of a surprise. This means I seldom get to celebrate National Day, especially when my parents request for a leave from the school celebrations so we can leave one day earlier. Still, I've attended enough of these celebrations to feel nolstagic now that I can no longer experience it all.

Every year without fail, there would be some of my peers who expressed their reluctance at attending the celebrations our school organised. They'd scoff at the red-and-white colour code, chit-chat with their friends while the Nat Day speech is being read out (I'm guilty of this too), and mumble the words to the Nat Day songs. The rest of us would be pretty excited about the whole affair (maybe because we didn't have to study and we didn't have to wear our uniforms) and the general atmosphere was rather hyped up.

My favourite part of the celebrations was always the song session. I love many of the oldies (older-gen Nat Day songs) like Home (1998), Where I Belong (2001), Reach Out For The Skies (2005), and We Will Get There (2002). These have beautiful melodies that transcend time. You know, I bet individually many of us just don't have the talent to sing well. But when everyone sings together, somehow it all balances out and becomes very lovely. The crazy thing is, I get so touched by this I actually teared sometimes (ok now it sounds like I cry a lot). It's just so hauntingly beautiful, you know?

Random fun fact: Every year, whenever we sing Where I Belong, people head into the chorus right after the first verse, when there's a second verse first. Every single year.

Anyway, since we're on the topic of Nat Day songs, I feel obliged to talk about this year's theme song, One Singapore. I don't know, nowadays I don't really remember what the new songs sound like. I think in primary school we were all taught (and made) to sing the songs, so we can remember for so long. I've heard quite a number of negative comments about the song, and I finally went to listen to it today. Hmm.. (better be careful here) Haha I guess it's not thaaat bad, just that it doesn't really have a nice melody that people would remember. The bridge felt a bit out of place.. but the last part (after the bridge) was not bad.

As you can probably tell, I kind of miss Nat Day celebrations. In university there isn't such a fun event for Nat Day and most people don't care anyway. And I just realised most schools had their celebrations today. Wish I could have crashed ): Singing the songs alone in my room with Youtube just ain't the same..

How do you celebrate your Nat Day?

Happy National Day,


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Tuesday, August 6, 2013 | 12:30 AM

I'm not the most patriotic Singaporean around, but having been in Perth for about 7 months now, there are some things about Singapore that I have come to realise I absolutely treasure.

1. Safety

If they did this in Perth, the police would run out of signs all the time.

My friend who got his mountain bicycle stolen in hall could do nothing about it, except buy another bicycle. So, contrary to popular belief, Singapore's police force aren't doing nothing. At least they bother putting up signs!

Also, I feel comfortable taking long walks in Singapore, but a simple 11km walk from hall to town's Maccas had us trying to shake off a creepy dude for quite a while. He only stopped following us when we entered Maccas. It wasn't fun having to watch our backs constantly, so I'm truly grateful that I feel safe in Singapore most of the time.

2. Public Transport

On a Tuesday evening, my friends and I took a 15 minutes bus ride to Subiaco to get some KFC. When we were done with dinner, it wasn't even 9pm yet. Alas, the last trains and buses back to hall were long gone. We had to take a 20 minutes walk in the rain to the nearest bus stop that still had running bus services, board a bus, alight at a bus stop, cross the road, board another bus, alight 10 minutes away from hall, and then walk back to hall.

Why is it so hard to return home after a simple dinner outside?!

Singapore's public transport may have its own problems, but at least you can find a simple route back home before midnight.

3. Efficiency

When the new buildings in our hall were slated to be done in half a year, what they really meant was one year. And the residents had to be kept waiting for 2 weeks 4 weeks 6 weeks before they could finally move into their new rooms. In Singapore, you could probably move into 6 weeks before the arranged date. (True story: My family planned to move into our new home in late June/ early July, but we moved in May instead!)

4. Singlish

It's a love-hate relationship with this one. Hate it when you let slip a Singlish phrase while speaking to Caucasian friends. But love it when the stranger next to you goes leh/ lah/ lor; I just have to go up to the person and befriend them because, hey siao eh only you know what I saying when I talk like that leh! Only Singlish has the power to let us immediately identify another Singaporean, and quickly forge a sense of familiarity and closeness.

5. Loved Ones

Ultimately, they are the ones who make me look forward to returning to Singapore.

/EDIT

6. I forgot about food.

How could I have forgotten to mention food?! All those nights of having indomee for supper just make me wish, more than ever, that I could be having wanton noodles or meepok or roti prata. It is also really annoying that Tim Ho Wan has been in Singapore for quite a while already, yet I haven't had the chance to try it. And this might sound crazy, but I've already planned my menu for the first day back home. So keen for my daddy's chilli crab for dinner!

Much love,

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Monday, August 5, 2013 | 10:17 PM



Just arrived home from Krabi yesterday. I haven't been to the airport since last Dec, and I realise now why people love the kinetic rain display at Changi - it's so soothing to watch them and a bit of a wondrous moment to see what form they'll take next.


This photo pretty much captures what Krabi was like. It rained from the time we reached, till around Saturday or Sunday when we were about to head back to Singapore. Still, it was a good trip overall because Krabi is lovely. We stayed at the Ritz (the exchange rate is 100 baht = S$4 if you were wondering). I was really impressed because this was seriously one of the best hotel experiences my family has had so far, even better than the ones here in Singapore because of the space and friendly staff. Some photos from around the resort:

Sights around our resort 






They even provided a beach basket, hat and towel. Along with crocs (funny thing, they're a huge fan of it because almost all the staff were wearing crocs. But good for the rainy weather) and a raincoat as we discovered as we were about to leave. 


I love the little nooks and crannies like this, they look very cosy and serene. 



Apparently they grow some of their own herbs. This was IN the resort - which is really a vast compound made up of multiple villas and such, and to get from one place to another you take a bugee. It was quite an experience to sit in a bugee the first night. The moment we reached they made sure we were sheltered under umbrellas then ushered to a bugee and before we knew it, we were being driven through the rain and darkness, thankfully by someone familiar with all the curves and turns of the place. I liked it.


Actually my family and I would have preferred not being driven around so much because there were so many sights we missed out on. Within the resort itself, there was lots to explore. This was just one of them. Everytime we set out to walk back (during the short periods without rain) after lunch or dinner, the efficient staff would meet us before we had walked very far from the restaurant.


Lovely ancient-looking door. It has a very nice colour of almost emerald-ish.


Took this on one of the days closer to our departure. We never got to visit the beach at our own resort because of the weather.


Put this together from different places. I think architecture is pretty interesting, and it's cool to see the detail put into creating the atmosphere of a place. The guy and the girl represent the toilet signs from our resort, and the elephant decorative piece was in the lobby of another resort we visited. I like the serenely happy expression on the faces of the wooden pieces.

Food!

The food was really good, another plus point for our resort and Krabi in general (though 3/4 of the time we ate at our own resort). They had unique flavours like satay that had been marinated with coconut milk. And sushi with mango in the rice rolls - which I prefer to the original since I'm not a big fan of sushi.



Plenty of fruits as expected. My mum commented on how some of the fruits we eat in Singapore were imported from Thailand, and here we were tasting it firsthand. Never really thought about how visiting a country can also mean visiting the origin of your food/fruit.



 The only thing was that the lighting in all the restaurants (even in the day) was quite dark, so I had to brighten these photos.


I know it's Thailand and it goes without saying that their Thai food is first-class, but I still have to say it: the pad thai was really really good! Along with pandan chicken. 


Tried a lot of new flavours. Usually I don't add sauce to my food, but with Thai food, the essence is the sauce. The above shows spring roles and avocado crabmeat salad (never tried avocado, haha and  can't say I'm a fan of it after trying). 


(tried rotating this photo but it ended up this way everytime I uploaded it) 

Sights around Krabi

When the rain finally cleared up for a short while, we went to explore the flea market, visited an elephant ride & show place, and a fishery. 



Interesting decor at the flea market. 


Didn't really get to take a photo of the elephants, but there was this adorable puppy running around the place. The moment he spotted us, he bounded over and kept running around our feet even while we made the slow descent down the hill towards the car again. This was a blur photo I took as we were leaving. 



My family isn't really the photo-taking kind, but this is us at the fishery! Brightened them a lot because of the grey skies. I went with my mum and brother since my sis just came back from a work/holiday trip to Europe, and my dad was house-sitting for us. 

The Most Friendly Staff

The staff definitely deserve a mention. My family and I took quite a liking to Tee, the guy who looked after us from the moment we reached (the adept one driving the bugee) to after we left (sending my mum's elephant souvenirs to the airport when we realised she had left it in the hotel room). He can speak English pretty okay and has bedhair haha he perpetually looks like he just got out of bed, but he really does his job well and he has this blur but friendly smile. We also met the manager, a guy named Carlos from Spain. He's been working there for about a year and he said it's very quiet compared to the cities he used to work in. Testament to the good service, when he heard that we were waiting for our bugee, he immediately offered us a ride on his own bugee sitting outside. Also I love the security guard - everytime we drove out of the resort, he was already up and on his feet, standing there to direct the driver with a smile on his face. Even though it was through the car window, his jovial air came across as a genuine good mood and not the usual 'service with a smile' (everytime we went in or out).

Activities 


Since it was raining so much, most of our time was spent indoors. It was great to pick up a book and read again though, I always forget how much I love and miss reading. And I re-watched movies. Krabi was a good break for me - haha have to admit I had mixed feelings about the complimentary wi-fi in the whole resort (though when I heard it it was a huge bonus considering that most hotels make you pay for a few hours of usage) since it meant I couldn't "cut off" as much as I wanted to. I'll miss diving under the white covers into the supersoft bed when I wanted to, it felt so good (especially with the weather the way it was), and I'll miss the pretty sight from the bed (picture right above).

Sunny Sights 

The good weather on the day we were leaving. Still, it means I had the chance to capture Krabi in its sunny beauty. I took these shots while we were driving to the airport.





This isn't the nicest photo, but I had to take one of the cute Taxi stops. Some of them had the "Taxi" sign painted in brown paint.


Haha I can't help but think this photo would aptly be titled "What it should have been" - blue skies and coconut trees. Nonetheless, it was an enjoyable trip! :)

Crab from Krabi

Almost forgot this, but what's Krabi without a photo of a crab? Seen on the beach while we were resort-hopping. My brother and I saw at least 3 in one area, and they blended in well with the sand.


With love,


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